incipit vita nova

Cannabis Baby: Mascot for One and All!

I've never had call to categorize something under so many categories before!

Cannabis Baby is the loveable mascot for our line of tshirts made for one and all ...

Right now he's the top-selling shirt and I'm sure everyone can see why ...

He successfully completed the Masters last week, and President Obama has appointed him Drug Czar ... vote yeah baby!!

It's all in a day's work for Cannabis Baby. With a lifestyle like this, he can't help but be rich and famous.

 

What's Going On With Harriet Klausner?

A couple of recent web visitors reminded me to look into Amazon's most prolific reviewer, Harriet Klausner. I started wondering - what's up with Harriet lately?

There's only one place to find out: our good friends at the Harriet Klausner Appreciation Society. These guys have been posting more than me so far this year! According to their countdown, Harriet shows no signs of slowing and has just passed the 27,000 review mark. If book reviews were mileage, Harriet's insurance premium would, without a doubt, skyrocket. 

Just one of Harriet's new nicknames is "The Perpetual Perpetrator of Poor Punctuation." I do like that. I also like "Cozy Queen of Crap." Go Buck Go! Hilarious. Harriet has been averaging anywhere from 6.9 to a blistering 8.04 reviews a day so far this year. According to Buck, this year's total of 900 book reviews represents 2 pages of reading a minute for 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, of course not counting the reviews, which are clearly written by alternate-universe Harriets. What Buck and the rest of the Society may have overlooked is the parallel universe or timeline explanation for Harriet's amazingly prolific reading and reviewing habit.

Now, the thing is: she gets free books. Loads and loads of them. But oh, what will Harriet do when the books slow to a trickle? In Harriet's own words - she is a speed reader who reads 2 books a day - but reviews anywhere between 6 and 9 a day (and sometimes - 72!). She's 1,055 in Amazon reviewers right now, but #1 in the Hall of Fame - whatever that is.

You don't think she's reading them, do you? Harriet . . . is . . . selling them. This is a great response from an actual reader/music listener about the miracle that is Harriet.

I actually have nothing against Harriet. She beats the white supremacists and other assorted trolls who've abused Amazon for years.

 

King Tut Looks Like Barbra Streisand

When I first saw the reconstruction of King Tut based on CT scans of his mummy and modern forensic science, I thought - he reminds me of Barbra Streisand!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hmn. I think so! Don't look at a current picture of her. Too much hair and cosmetic surgery. 

Sandre Swanson: The Best Candidate? (For Golf Club Host)

A new candidate for shunning:  he's probably nowhere near as bad as many of the villains, egotists and losers we've elected to the State Legislature - he actually looks like a nice and pleasant man in his pictures - but according to California Assemblyman Sandre Swanson of Oakland (16th California Assembly District), a major problem in California is the fact that about 900 convicted drug felons have not previously been receiving Food Stamps.

Breitbart reported today that highly-critical legislation sponsored by Sandre passed today to allow California to make an extra-special effort to provide Food Stamp benefits to convicted drug felons. Also according to Breitbart, "Under the federally funded program, people convicted of drug felonies are banned from receiving the aid after they leave prison. But states can opt out of that ban, and California lawmakers voted Thursday 42-23 to do that."

It's going to cost $1 million.  Chump change, right?

Here is what Sandre's official Assembly page says his priorities are: "Education and the health and safety of California’s children are Assemblyman Swanson’s top priorities in the California State Assembly. Assemblyman Swanson believes in keeping our promise to build strong communities and create sustainable jobs for our children."

So, that's why Sandre is a liar to the people and would probably do better as the local golf club host (see below).  Everyone with a clue knows that people with raging drug habits sell their food stamps for cents on the dollar, taking the "proceeds" to buy their drugs to feed their habits.  Most often, food stamps are sold to drug gang members, who then sell them at a slight discount to hungry families in the area, or to unscrupulous inner-city grocery and convenience stores who make good money cashing them in, while preserving their store stock for paying customers.  EBT "Electronic Benefit Cards" are no hindrance, as it is easy to process a grocery order, give the addict a few dollars out of the till, and put the groceries right back on the shelf.

No one made that Federal law to "hurt drug addicts," they made it because it was well-known and proven empirically and through heavily-funded studies that providing food stamps would not effectively put food in the stomach of a drug addict.  

And in addition, I am sure teachers are being laid off in the schools in Sandre's Oakland district as I type this.  I am equally certain that college students in need of assistance in buying books and other aid through the EOPS program are struggling with all of that program's cuts, and that there are mothers with little children out there who could use some of those food stamps - but who won't get them - because THEY'RE NOT DRUG FELONS.  

 I'm no expert on Oakland except I know that it's a money pit of unprecedented proportions and hardly a government dime of the billions spent there since the 1960's has made one bit of improvement for the lower-income residents - every quality of life aspect has just gotten worse and worse and worse.

I know that Oakland spawns a peculiar breed of extremely arrogant, self-entitled and puffed up politician and bureaucrat - people who make Los Angeles County Supervisor and career self-aggrandizer Mark Ridley-Thomas look like an amateur.

That said, this "social activist" and "champion of the people" has done the following things for his Assembly District - in the man's own words on his campaign website:

• "Sandré served as Chairman of the City of Alameda Golf Commission which manages Alameda’s successful 45 hole golf complex. As a Commissioner he is leading the Commissions current planning effort for a new club house for the Alameda Golf Complex and is working on the long range planning for a hotel and sports complex at Alameda Point (former Navel Air Station). Sandré is committed to providing recreational activities for children and families."
• Not to be outdone with providing a new golf clubhouse for children and families, always the best-known users of 45-hole golf complexes, "Sandré served as Chairman and Commissioner for the city of Oakland’s Civil Service Commission for two terms. The Commission’s caseload for employee and union appeals doubled because each appeal got a fair hearing from Chairman Swanson. He worked to protect the rights of employees in the work place. Sandré fought for the principles of progressive management and for fair promotions for minorities and woman in the police department, fire department, in public works and thought-out city government." - and let's not forget FOOD STAMPS FOR DRUG FELONS.

And of course - dating to 1993 - i.e. 17 YEARS AGO - this is how Sandre brought economic business to Oakland:

• The Oakland Federal Building was built in 1993. The effort to bring the federal building to Oakland took more than a decade and Sandré was assigned to head this project for Congressman Dellums office. This very important project that required great team work from many local partners which the Congressional office insisted, included labor. Sandré helped win this very important two hundred million dollar project for Oakland and today the Ronald V. Dellums Federal Building is the work place for many federal employees and its twin towers represent an impressive gateway to our city.
• As Chairman of the Alameda County Retirement Board Sandré led the successful effort to purchase and not continue to lease a building in downtown Oakland. That building now serves as the permanent home for Alameda County retirees. The building has also been a very successful investment for our County pension fund.

So, also - according to the California Employment Development Department drawing from US Bureau of Labor Statistics Information -

The City of Oakland's annual average unemployment rate for 2009 was 16.0%.

The City of Oakland's unemployment rate for March 2010 was 17.7%.

Here are the highest employment categories for the city as of the 2000 census (the others are all so small, they are insignificant - including manufacturing, technology, fishing and farming, and even retail-

Services 87,857    48.9% (this is not 48.9% attorneys and doctors)

Public Administration    7,895    4.5% <--- that's that Federal Building and all the other Government Pensioners championed by Sandre.

Now, Oakland is a city of about 400,000 people - and if you live there, you have a one-in-78 chance of being the victim of a violent crime.  The California state average is one-in-178.  93% of US cities are "safer" than Oakland.  The neighborhood/property buyer or renter analysis website with this information and maps is here. There are 469 crimes committed per-square-mile per year in Oakland, nearly 4 times the number statewide, and far above the national average.

I think all of these problems will be quickly solved by paying off more government-employee workers comp claims, ensuring equal opportunity to the biggest pensions possible for all government workers (except those who are "white" and those doing a good job and those with some vague sense of pride), in building more golf clubhouses and another Federal job building to give those crowded workers a little extra space, raising taxes some more . . . and of course . . .

Making sure the Drug Felons of Oakland cheating convenience store owners and drug kingpins get their food stamps well-deserved social justice profits.

Sandre's opponents don't even have websites.  But for the record, they are businessman and Republican candidate James I "Jim" Faison, and business owner and Libertarian candidate Lisa Ringer.

Since I am pretty sure lots of dead people vote in Oakland, and their minds are awful hard to change once they are made up - I guess we'll have Sandre back in the Legislature real soon . . .  That's what I call "social justice."

Hey, guess what?  Drug Felons already CAN get Food Stamps in California.  They just have to fill out a questionnaire (FS-26 dated 12-09) and show they are in a treatment program or have completed one - and provide "proof" - except, guess what?  They can choose to just "talk to a worker."  Waaaay to gooo, Sandre. That's really solving California's problems - be sure to "oppose Gov. Schwarzenegger too" - any way you can.  Like this, since he's already vetoed this idiotic bill before!  Man, those "estimated 860 drug felons, most of them women" that can't even be bothered to fill out FS-26 and talk to a worker - that's some really critical "social justice" that's going to get our State back on the right track.  

Bruce, "how do these people get elected"?  - see "dead people" and "brain-dead people" above.  It's Oakland.  

Blue Meanie From WalMart

You probably have been dead if you haven't seen People of Walmart. Occasionally, I do shop at WalMart.  While I've seen some pretty gross things there, I've never had the privilege of seeing in-person the level of special that is featured on People of WalMart. 

They compared this lady to a Blue Meanie.

How right-on can you get?

How did they know??  I mean, when they did Yellow Submarine - how did they know they were REAL??  

Google aka Topeka Déjà vu

This isn't the first time this has happened to me.  I decided to look further into Jungian memes, and upon typing this phrase into Google, obtained this result:

So disappointing. 

When one hopes to learn, one finds what one already said. Google Déjà vu.

$1 Billion US Embassy in Battersea: Where is Mad King George When Needed?

I swear I wasn't going to put up anything else regarding current affairs, taxes, etc.  But I can't resist this evening's headline from the Times Online:  U.S. Diplomats Add A Moat to their expenses at $1bn London Embassy.

This is not a favorable article, and it mentions that the U.S. is delinquent on payment of approximately £32 million in fees related to London congestion for its current embassy in central London.  

Ah, a lovely, large glass cube - this picture does not show the moat that has been recently added to the design of the new embassy.

According to the Times, which is displaying a photo of the current embassy model, the moat is 30 meters wide, and separates the "vast crystalline cube" from the Battersea "wasteland" site where the development, and others, are to be erected.

Plans for erecting bomb-resistant walls and barriers outside the current embassy site in Grosvenor Square met with strong opposition from local residents, according to the Times.  Additional disputes continue over the U.S. responsibility for the Central London congestion fees, and for the Value-Added-Tax or VAT taxes imposed on the planned new construction.

Apparently, money-wise, the existing Grosvenor Square embassy was sold to a Qatari group of investors for more than $1 billion.  According to the Times, long considered one of the world's newspapers of record, "The State Department sought to play down the cost of security measures, noting the expense of London building work. But the price puts the London embassy above the US’s most fortified missions, including the Baghdad embassy, which cost $600 million (£390 million) but required a further $100 million of work on air conditioning, and the Islamabad embassy, still under construction, which has cost more than $850 million."

The Guardian is not-so-kind - "Ambassador, You are spoiling our view of the Thames with this boring glass cube."  From the Independent, "For its new English home, America builds a castle."  Jay Merrick, the Independent's architecture correspondent, noted that the design "epitomises the post-9/11 bunker-mentality that has swept through embassy design since the Twin Towers fell."  Our NY Times said, "A New Fort, er, Embassy for London."  ABC News:  "A Fortress, but open."  But . . . how much does it cost?  Bloomberg is reporting only $500 million - half of $1 billion.

Apparently, it's an "eco-cube" and is carbon-neutral.  I guess the moat represents alternative transportation, as applicants for VISAs and employees can probably live somewhere out in the extensive green, grassy mound, and take kayaks to the secure, bomb-shielded, yet eco-friendly entry.

* * * *

Having received commentary, I now sort of think this:

Could be what they had in mind.  A Zardoz cube. 

Ever Wonder if Politicians Read Messages From Constituents? 59 Days Later: Sen. Barbara Boxer's Response

On December 23, 2009, I wrote the first letter I've ever written to any state, local or federal elected official.

From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

Wed, Dec 23, 2009 8:52 p.m.

Dear Senator Boxer: I received an e-mail this evening from Carly Fiorina, candidate for U.S. Senate. She asked that if we opposed the current 2,000-page Health Care Reform bill, to write you and I quote, "ask Senator Barbara Boxer to do the right thing for California by voting NO on this legislation – click here to send her an email today expressing your concerns with this legislation. This bill will expand the role of government in health care decisions, decrease the quality of our health care and increase the tax burden on Californians by $3 billion." I heard and read about several Senators from other states who once again as is so often heard and seen, received substantial amounts of special money for health care and other programs benefiting the residents of their states, and once again, I heard of nothing to benefit Californians outside our doing our duty to power much of the country's economy as our own resources dwindle, tens of thousands of highly-educated, talented professionals leave the state, large businesses leave the state, and more tens of thousands of average, hardworking families also leave. Even recent immigrants are leaving due to the lack of ability to find adequate work and support their families, especially in today's hard economic climate. As a community college teacher, I have witnessed hundreds of students struggle to work full time, support families, pay taxes and continue with their education. Students are now experiencing the highest difficulty in transferring to four-year colleges, and the Cal State, UC and Cal Poly systems are experiencing unprecedented deficits and facing the toughest choices in their history. This education is our state, and our nation's future. California was once the leader. Now our best minds will be leaving for other states, other schools and university systems, and in today's global economy and scientific community - other nations - just as America, once very long ago, was able to benefit from the best and brightest minds of other nations such as Albert Einstein and Enrico Fermi. As a 6th-generation Southern California native, I have long known that Southern California can expect little or nothing from Sacramento, and little or nothing from its 2 long-time Bay Area senators, who take the votes and political contributions from this area, particularly from our film, television and media industries (now also in retreat for many years, experiencing better financial conditions in Canada and Europe), and return nothing, barely bothering to return phone calls and providing no support or leadership whatsoever in helping to solve the region's tremendous environmental, transportations, economic, and social challenges. I think my message is this - don't expect anything positive in return from anybody. You can issue all the press statements you want. You can live in whatever vacuum you live in, flying in private jets, buying vast quantities of bottled water, enjoying the privileged lifestyle that your generation aspired to, and which is laying such an incalculable, unsustainable burden of waste, debt, fraud, deceit and short-sightedness upon those of future generations. It is my generation that will witness this mess, it is our children that will suffer the most for it, and I can only hope and pray that it will be our grandchildren who will discover a way out of it. Anger and dismay run wide and deep. Do not expect any votes or praise in the future as we all know that is all you and your colleagues care about. Even if we cannot read and understand the entire 2,000 page bill, all the horse trading and wheeling-dealing that has gone on makes it obvious to everyone that it will help few people and only provide more wasteful greed, graft and useless government jobs that take all our resources and tax dollars and produce absolutely nothing but more daily sacrifice, higher taxes and trouble in return.

Sincerely, Amy Sterling Casil

Today, I received the following answer:

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Sat, Feb 20, 2010 1:59 pm
Subject: Responding to your message

Dear Ms. Casil:

 

Thank you for writing to me about pending health care reform legislation.  I appreciate hearing from you.

There is widespread agreement that we must reform our health insurance system, which is a huge financial burden on our families.  The status quo is no longer sustainable.  Thousands of Americans lose their insurance every day while thousands more are denied coverage.  If we do nothing, 45 percent of an average family's income will go towards health insurance premiums in 2016.  And without action, Medicare will be broke by 2017. 

On February 25, 2010, President Obama will hold a bipartisan summit on comprehensive health insurance reform.  I strongly believe that we must seize this opportunity to move forward on health care reform, and I hope that we can.

I will continue to fight for health care reform for Californians and all Americans.

Again, thank you for writing to me.  Please feel free to contact me again about this or other issues of concern to you.

Barbara Boxer
United States Senator

The Horrible Editorial Blacklist

To "Todd" the Timid, Adam-Troy Castro's correspondent:

According to Adam, "Todd" wrote him expressing concern that, and I quote,

First of all, let me say that I don't think well enough of myself to be paranoid (why bother being out to get me?) but something happened that made me wonder. I submitted a story to (THE MAGAZINE) late one night and had the rejection before dawn the next morning. I cannot imagine (THE EDITOR) sitting up all night reading through his slush pile. The only thing I can think is that he has a filter on the e-mail addresses of people he has already rejected and kicks those over to the auto-responder. Does this sound reasonable to you?

Adam was nice to Todd.  He told him there was no blacklist and gave him four options that could have caused the rapid rejection response.

Todd, the truth is, you sent your work to somebody who was doing his or her job efficiently.  The chances you've landed on any type of blacklist are slim and none.  The real truth is that writers choose to not send their work to editors, not the other way around - any writers with any sense, that is.  Now, this can be because they consider the editor to be beneath themselves due to the editor's poor behavior and poor quality of product (rare, but it does happen), it could be because the writer senses that the publication isn't the best fit with their work, or it could just be because they have found others with whom their work and taste is much more in accordance.  The sooner writers wake up and smell the coffee, the sooner they can get down to their work, which is writing.

As to short fiction, Todd, that has been a hobby and pastime for many years.  There is no such thing as anybody writing short fiction for a 'living' these days, not even in rich America, and most certainly not in other countries around the world.  

Putting that truth aside, Todd, the last thing you should be worried about is why your story was rejected.  You should also be grateful that the editor was so on-the-ball that your story was back to you to put to useful purpose the next morning after you sent it.

Todd, when you send your work to any editor, you are proposing a business transaction.  Not a friendship, not a "hey, do ya like me?" offer, and not any type of commentary on your personal worth, or, this is the most important:  on your abilities as a writer. 

From all that I can determine, the great Robert A. Heinlein appeared only four times in The Saturday Evening Post.  Three stories appeared in 1947 - "The Green Hills of Earth," "Space Jockey," and "It's Great to Be Back."  "The Black Pits of Luna" appeared early the next year.  I freely admit to have never read three of the stories, but "The Green Hills of Earth" was definitely written in a manner to reach a very broad audience.  That was the audience for that magazine - a very different and less-specialized audience than the other magazines in which Heinlein's stories appeared frequently, which, prior to "The Green Hills of Earth" appearing in 1947, had been almost exclusively in Astounding - like from 1939 to 1947, so eight long years.

Short fiction is undergoing a bit of renaissance now, Todd.  Some people's short fiction collections have been on bestseller lists this past year. Not SF/F stories, but other, "regular" stories.  Everyone has had a lot of chitchat the last few years about what a bad state short science fiction and fantasy is in; it's hardly the "go-to" place these days.  However, even the poor state of short science fiction and fantasy, the crappy pay, the low readership and the uncertain treatment shouldn't discourage you, if writing stories is your heart's desire.

All of this is by way of saying, be glad that editor got back to you so quickly, Todd.  Get that story in circulation elsewhere, as fast as possible.

And that said, do these editors a favor, Todd.  Read their publications.  Look at the type of work that appears in them.  This will give you an idea of the audience and the types of stories they enjoy.  Picking work that makes their audience happy and satisfied is the editor's job, Todd.  Writing things that the audience will enjoy - is yours.

Location, Location, Lo-- NCIS Los Angeles -- Serial TV killer

I could be misjudging due to the recency of the horror, but NCIS Los Angeles might be the worst television pilot ever aired, where they actually went on to air the series.

Acid, Ecstasy, all these other rave drugs - none can explain the . . . televised object that is NCIS Los Angeles. 

First, it's obvious that it was originally NCIS San Diego, where there actually is a naval base and, as shown in a random scene in this totally random (like, even more random than the gummi bear aliens in Space Chimps) show, "Fleet Week."

How do they pay off Entertainment Weekly?  Pretty well, obviously!  NCIS - the original - did great in its season premiere.  The sequel/spinoff, NCIS Los Angeles, also got good ratings, but I wonder how many suicides it caused among unwary continuing viewers.  I thought this LA Times review was going to recount the plot in its favorable review - but no.  It didn't!  That's because WTF???  They used to pay people off in the 60's and 70's for sure, but . . . ???

A quote, "Writer and executive producer Shane Brennan has worked on "NCIS" for years; he knows what he's doing and how to do it well; the casting is solid, the crimes international. What's not to like?"

LOL!  How about - it doesn't make SENSE and it's obvious it was supposed to be in San Diego?  How about, I can't remember a single character's name except the initial "G" for the Chris O'Donnell character?  How about, I can tell L.L. Cool J would be good and is a talented actor trying mightly to overcome a retarded script and dialog that is less sensical than the SyFy Channel version of Flash Gordon? 

These Naval Criminal Intelligence Service (NCIS) agents work out of what I think is the San Antonio Winery or something very similar.  They park right at the doorstep of a "secret" entrance that is basically someone's Larchmont or WeHo home.  Then they walk in, and it's suddenly the "winery"-cum-NCIS HQ.  This individual depicted above is Oscar-winning actress Linda Hunt, who has portrayed many roles brilliantly.  Considering Linda is playing Edith Head, the assistant "Q" to L.L. Cool J and Chris McDonnell (who seriously, there is no real way to tell or remember their names - the good black actor who's trying to survive, and the hapless white guy who has to explain he has only a letter for a name and it isn't like "M", "Q", 007 - or Gibbs) - she does an awesome job.

This is the kind of show where the NCIS quartermaster (that's what "Q" stands for in the Bond stories) rolls out the wardrobe rack right off the wardrobe truck and dresses the "main" character we are supposed to "feel for."

OK, look, in the opening scene, the bullet hole in this guy's back looked like a giant zit to me.  And the show did not go uphill from there.

These writers should be taken outdoors and given the "Weird Al" Amish Paradise treatment.  Something - anything.  All I can suggest is that they might want to try the CSI-Miami alternate universe.  This was so bad I want to die.  Worst TV episode I have ever seen.  Poor L.L. Cool J.  He is a good actor - he would be a great addition to the original NCIS - fantastic, sometimes outlandish, but at least you can tell what is going on!!!  Ducky, I think this one's DOA.