incipit vita nova

You've Been Naughty, Jack Bauer!

Jack Bauer interrogates Santa  . . . but no one can get Santa to talk . . . not even Jack!  Only 300,000 views - we can do better guys!  (On Facebook, click on the large blue title or go to more and click "see original post").

Ryan Bingham: My Hero

The 7th man to achieve the coveted American Airlines ultra-platinum 10-million mile flyer award, Ryan Bingham is my hero.  Yes, these programs for frequent flyers are real - here's a lower-level chart showing what lowly 1- and 2-million mile flyers can get.

But, alas, Ryan Bingham isn't a real person.  He's the hero of Up in the Air, the new film by Ivan Reitman starring George Clooney that was released today.

Up in the Air is getting great reviews from critics and regular viewers, including Dorothy on Ch. 11 (Dorothy is almost always right).  I liked it a lot, and though not really a comedy, it has plenty of legitimately funny and wry moments.  It instantly reminded me of Thank You For Smoking (2005), which turns out to be director Reitman's first film, with his second being Juno.

So Ivan Reitman is officially a great director, and we know we can always trust George Clooney.  For 80% of the movie, Vera Farmiga is one of the most likeable film ladies I've seen in a long time. I promise to still like her in future movies . . . I think.  I was also surprised to see Jason Bateman doing amazingly well at his Les Grossman imitation as Ryan's horrific boss (he informs him early in the film that he's just taken his first dump in two weeks, which serves to curtail their long-distance chitchat).

A lot of people will find Up in the Air hard to watch considering that Ryan Bingham's job is to fly all over America and fire people.  As the movie started, I hated him already -- over the course of the film, I came to love him.  A lot of people also might consider that the movie has a "down" ending.  I consider it a victory of sorts.  It's really a great piece of filmmaking.  Now, I want to read the book by Walter Kirn, although the reader reviews make it seem as though this insight into a part of who we are as Americans doesn't sit well with many people.

As to Up in the Air, the film?  It gets four trips to the Admiral's Club and four plastic in-flight bottles of JD straight up.  Would you like a cancer?

Tell them Les sent you.

Could I have done it without you?  A nutless monkey could have done your job!   

80's Music . . . 80's Movies

I've got some pretty classic stuff from the 80's, including my prized black velvet jacket from Judy's (size 4).

I heard a lot of music back then, especially being a club and radio DJ.  However, this song, "Voyage, Voyage" by Desireless didn't stick with me.  I can't imagine why, after watching this video that has almost SIX MILLION VIEWS on YouTube.  The female singer Jeanne Mas is supposedly an inspiration for a famous game character and is also referred to as the French Madonna.  Watch carefully at 3.06, you will see another special friend . . . the ever-great actor, David Caruso (CSI Miami - of "Steeevie" fame).

Who remembers this 80's classic?  "Everybody Have Fun Tonight" by Wang Chung.  Now, ya think this "live" performance is lip-synched or not?

By the way, Universal Music disables embedding on their videos, with the results that the artists have less than 1% of the views that those that are not embedded have.

This little trip down memory lane also reminded me of a great 80's film, To Live and Die in LA, written and directed by William Friedkin, with a score by Wang Chung.  It's been so long since I saw the film that I forgot it starred someone we all know well today from CSI (hmn - is that a trend?  See Caruso above):  William Petersen.  Don't die or anything, but . . .

Is that not just . . .

The film also stars uber-creepy Willem Dafoe.

 

Why Are Vampires Romantic?

This picture might be one clue.  It's Tom Cruise as Lestat and Brad Pitt as Louis in the one of the biggest hot vampire movies ever: 1994's Interview With the Vampire, based on Anne Rice's bestselling book. 

People torture themselves into all types of contortions over why vampires in books, films and TV are so popular, hot, sexy, etc.

OK, look at that picture.  Why are Vampires so hot?  Look at that picture.  Again.  Sorry young, hot popular vampire guys of today . . . the ladies just didn't get to see this movie when they, and it, were in their prime.  I kind of think they would at least have liked Brad Pitt better.  Plus I've always liked Tom Cruise in his acting roles.  Jumping on Oprah's couch?  Not so much.

I also really liked Gary Oldman as Dracula - he might have played some creepy parts since, and is sort of stuck in strange, odd roles now, but you know what?  Hot.  Gary Oldman, Dracula in Francis Ford Coppola's Dracula 1992 - hot.

I remember why I bought those blue glasses!

But there was an even hotter Dracula when I was the most susceptible ever.  He might have burned this memory from my mind with the horror that was Quilty (my former boss Tony was equally horrified - he described it, and I had to watch just to see it! - boy was I sorry) in the remake of Lolita, but at one point in time, Frank Langella was the hottest man on the planet.

I mean, I think he spoiled me for any other man, forever more.  A schoolgirl . . . Frank Langella . . . aiii!!!

I don't know Carla here - but she seems great, and I agree 100% with her.  Vampires are romantic and hot because they are a) hot; and b) immortal; and c) you might get that way too if they choose you!

Look at how handsome this guy was.  I mean - dang.

Just, dang. 

  

Rob Lowe: Too Late to Say Goodbye

Thanks to Jillian, Dorothy and Steve (again) . . . Rob Lowe was on the Channel 11 news this a.m. promoting his new TV movie "Too Late to Say Goodbye" based on Ann Rule's book about the murders of Jennifer Corbin and Dolly Hearn by the handsome, charming and deadly Bart Corbin.  It's going to be on tomorrow night at 7 PM on Lifetime.

I read the original book this past July and wrote a memorial to Jennifer and Dolly.

 Here's a picture of Rob Lowe.  I'm sure this is a great part for Rob, who for my generation will never be forgotten, no matter how many embarrassing sex tapes he may have made using what I am sure was a unique and totally forgivable lapse of judgment.  I.e., Rob Lowe is way too handsome and could make 500 sex tapes and I'd still watch anything he was in (not sex tape . . . sorry) . . .

As to the story, the silver lining to the horrible cloud caused by Bart Corbin's brutal murders is that Dolly Hearn's family finally was able to have some closure and healing, and Jennifer's children are being lovingly cared for by her family.  Both horrible murders have led to caring and help for other victims and their families -- in the end.  It's my understanding that Bart Corbin still insists on his innocence and agitates to be released.  The internet also played a role early in the investigation period of Jennifer Corbin's "suicide" (the MO that Corbin used for both killings).  Bart's family and friends attacked Jennifer's family.  As to Ann Rule, I was happy to see Rob promoting her work, and he was very familiar with all of her books.  She has to be the best writer ever to cover crimes that shock and chill all who learn about them, and she always finds the human element of every story - I believe with a tremendous amount of caring and empathy for survivors of horrific crimes, and for the surviving family members.

Vote 4 The Leader of the Post-2012 World - 11 White Guys!

Eleven people, I'm guessing viewers or fans, are competing for the fake internet title of "Leader of the Post-2012 World" sponsored by Roland Emmerich's soon-to-be-released film 2012.  

So, all 11 are white guys, and it looks like their ages range from 19 to like, my age.  I just watched part of the first guy's video, enough to realize that it wasn't a Coke Film School project, just camera sit-downs and answers given to pat questions.

Has any time passed at all?  Was Barack Obama elected President or did I imagine that?  Is Hillary Clinton the Secretary of State?  Or Pee-Wee Hermann?  Weren't there both African-American and female presidents on 24?

Tell me if you think it's ludicrously outdated to pick eleven white males, I am assuming English-speaking Americans (I didn't watch all videos), for this internet contest?  Is this film being released worldwide?  Is every country going to have its own contest?  My students were all like, "What?"  Even the guys who could have qualified!

Elizabeth Taylor and Being Non-Blonde

I I had one of the most remarkable experiences of my life when, probably about 2-3 years before Meredith was born, I decided to go to the Redlands Bowl Associates gala as Elizabeth Taylor. I had noticed that I had a few facial similarities to her, and studied her Cleopatra makeup carefully and did my best to duplicate it. The eyebrows took forever.

Like all those who grew up in my time, Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton were "the" couple.  I knew the shocking story of how she stole Eddie Fisher from Debbie Reynolds, whom everybody loved.  Who would know that years later, Carrie Fisher, the daughter of Debbie and Eddie, would become another film icon?

Regardless of her extremely stormy personal life, I always had respect for Liz - she always married the guy!  She said she truly loved Mike Todd, but lost him in a terrible plane crash.  Then came the dreadful upset with Eddie Fisher, and then Richard Burton.  News has come out that while married to Eddie, whom she got by cheating, Liz began cheating with Richard Burton, and he dropped her -- then, she took sleeping pills and nearly died.

This seemed to have worked, because she got Richard Burton to return, and they were in each others' orbits for the rest of their lives.  

What did I learn as a personal and shocking lesson by my "dress up as Liz" adventure?

Blondes do have more "fun," if fun means light-hearted, non-threatening attention.  People treat girls with dark hair horrifically.  First, I had done such a good job that no one recognized me, except a couple of my friends.  One of them actually went as Cleopatra, where I didn't go full-on Cleo.  I just wore a dark wig and a purple halter dress.  This dress was one of my $15 specials and I had it for quite a long time - the wig, too.  When I realized that people truly weren't recognizing me, I decided to play along, and didn't open my mouth for most of the whole evening.  They weren't going to recognize me, I reasoned, as long as they didn't recognize my voice or my distinctive laugh.  

Not just one, but several of my friends' husbands acted completely differently from any way they ever had before.  They knew I was married, the same as they were.  We were all in the same age group, and these folks all had great families, and before that night, I'd thought they were the nicest, most respectful family men ever. Not to put too fine a point on it, they were interested in only one thing, and it didn't matter that I wasn't speaking.  The black wig had turned them all into - what's the technical term? - randy horndogs.  I have never lacked for gentlemanly attention, but this was a new experience.  Genuine "sex object" - nothing else whatsoever.  After about 3 hours, I'd had enough.  I took off the wig and they were all very embarrassed, apologetic, and of course I looked like hell because I'd slicked down my blonde hair to put the infernal wig smoothly over it.

Why did this pop into my head?  The National Enquirer is covering a new book about Elizabeth Taylor that alleges she tried to commit suicide when Richard Burton broke things off with her early-on.

The story includes the trailer from the 1965 "epic" The Sandpiper.  This was a movie version capitalizing on the real-life spectacular romance of Taylor and Burton.  I've only seen parts of it on TV, because it truly is horrible.  

The trailer is mercifully short, but Liz makes a heartfelt plea to Richard Burton along the lines of "I've been passed along from man to man all my life.  I don't think a man can ever truly love a woman like me. . ."

Now, Walter Chow (see above) is right that The Sandpiper is a pretty awful movie, made even more awful by its attempt to portray Liz as a "hippie" in total designer "hippie" clothing, while Richard Burton as a stuffy Episcopal priest is just ridiculous, plus - as Walter points up - WTF was the guy doing cheating on Eva Marie-Saint in the first place?  Well.  Eva Marie-Saint was a lovely blonde lady.  La Liz?  "I've been passed along from man to man . . . "

Just look today at beautiful Rihanna - how Chris Brown treated her!  It's not skin color, it's hair and probably eye color (my eyes aren't purple like Liz Taylor's, but they are an unusual shade of blue and probably looked really dark with all that Cleopatra makeup).

If you love La Liz and Richard Burton as I do, here's a great rundown of the DVD collection of all their movies, from the sublime (Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?) to the ridiculous (The Sandpiper) and the mind-boggling (Cleopatra).  Blondes do have more fun.  Just not the way that people think.

Skaz is NOT Surprise - it's Gotcha

All these years and I've thought the Russian literary term "skaz" meant "surprise."  The idea that I thought that the term represented was certainly helpful to me, in understanding the delights of twists and turns of plot and character.

According to the "Literary Encyclopedia," this is not what "skaz" refers to.  Instead, "skaz" is a term referring to narration. In the Russian "Formalist" school of criticism, the term was apparently invented to refer to a use of language in narration that had a "storytelling" quality - i.e. a first-person narrator that was telling the story with a distinctive method and voice.  The Literary Encyclopedia refers to Gogol and Leskov, and several 20th Century Russian writers.

I understand these examples as being comparable in English-language literature to Faulkner's narrator ("A Rose for Emily") and similar voice-driven writing.

But my understanding of what I'll now call "gotcha" is more useful.  I watched the 1996 movie Ransom last night.  Not everyone liked that movie - they disapproved of the violence and threats against children that are part of the plot.  Those who did like the movie found its ever-evolving plot addictive.  

The first big "gotcha" that occurs in the film isn't really the kidnapping of hot-tempered airline executive Tom Mullen's son.  There are an escalating series of "gotchas" when, after the kidnapping has become public and Tom has agreed to take the $2 million ransom to an arranged location, he leaves his house and a series of events occur that become the turning point of the movie.  Up until that point, it seems to be a pretty standard child-in-danger story, and since Mel Gibson is starring, one assumes he'll take some type of horrible revenge on the kidnappers while rescuing his son against impossible odds.  That's a story we've seen hundreds of times before.

Here are the series of ever-escalating "gotchas":

• Tom leaves his FBI-filled luxury flat overlooking Central Park with the money, refusing to allow anyone to go with him to the dropoff point (as requested by the kidnappers).
• A car leaves from the front entrance and is beseiged by media vans and paparazzi.  When it stops, the driver looks out - it's not Tom Mullen.
• Cut to Tom, leaving by another exit in a similar car.  Only a small amount of media are there, and one red van doggedly pursues him.
• At the inevitably quick traffic snarl, Tom gets out of his car, opens the trunk (where we've seen the money put earlier) and grabs a tire iron.
• Without a word, he smashes the driver's side window of the van and grabs the keys, throwing them far down the street, then returns to his car and travels on.
• At the next traffic snarl, Tom sees his son's face in a series of televisions in a store window (an overused technique, but . . . what the hey).
• Something . . . happens . . . Tom gets on the phone and says he has a change of plans and orders an employee to get him on the Channel 5 news.
• Cut to disarray back at FBI luxury flat HQ - then to the newsroom.
• Sitting at a newsdesk surrounded by the money, Tom makes his shocking announcement:  he is turning the $2 million ransom into a $2 million bounty on the kidnapper's head.  Anyone who can bring the kidnapper in, dead or alive, will receive the money.  The only way for the kidnapper to avoid this is, Tom says, to return his son alive and unharmed.

Game-changer.  The reason this is such a great, powerful "gotcha" is that it isn't just a mechanical thriller series of plot twists.  Each surprising twist is rooted in the character of Tom Mullen - and in the other characters as well.  The FBI doesn't want Mullen to "go rogue," but it can't control him.  His wife wants him to obey the kidnapper's instructions at any cost, to save her son's life.  Mullen has his own ideas, which lead to the incredible revelation that the kidnapper is no longer calling the shots, and has gone in an instant from a savvy criminal expecting a big payoff for a bold crime, to a man with an enormous bounty on his head.

In SF/F, this type of twist is a little more difficult, because there is the extra layer of story that must be explained or presented related to the fantastic elements.  As an SF/F writer whose work is a little closer to contemporary fiction than some others, I might be able to include this type of "gotcha" more easily.  "Perfect Stranger" has a little of this element, in that I don't think the reader knows exactly what way Gary, the father, is going to go in the end - until the very end.  That's rooted exactly in the story, because Gary himself did not know exactly what he would do until he did it.

In some ways, that's a flaw of some SF/F.  The characters "act" in certain ways because the author is trying to tell a "certain type" of story or make a certain type of point.  Ransom isn't just a taut, exciting thriller, it's also morally ambiguous at a certain level. One is never certain that Tom Mullen came up with the ransom-to-bounty idea because he firmly believed that the kidnappers would kill his son as soon as they got the ransom, or because he did NOT want to pay the ransom and was in a mano-a-mano with the chilling bad cop Jimmy Shaker, brilliantly portrayed by Gary Sinise.  When his wife begs him to take back the bounty, it's really difficult to tell how much of his bravado is based in his belief that his actions are the only way to save his son's life, and how much is stubborn determination to emerge victorious over the kidnapper - a battle of wills with the boy's life as the pawn.  It's things like that which carry a good story over the top to being great.

Snape Hath Been Shortchanged

I saw the new Harry Potter movie yesterday.  While I enjoyed it greatly, I think it would be very confusing for moviegoers who haven't read the books - and I know they're out there.  One would have no idea of what was going on with Snape.  And even more -- I don't think the average moviegoer would particularly "get" the meaning of Snape being the "Half-Blood Prince."

One reviewer even mentioned that they could see what was going on in Snape's eyes, thereby making a magnificent performance.  I spent a great deal of time there above, creating the anguished look - after all, even though I'm not the die-hard Harry Potter fan, with each sentence of each book memorized, I was quite certain "Snape Good" after the end of the book Half-Blood Prince.  I can't say that it was any particular genius on my part; simply a by-product of being an INFJ.  We are not easy to fool (not to say it cannot be done - and such antics are quite tragic).

If you enjoy the Harry Potter characters, friendships and stories, you will certainly enjoy Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.  The film did a super job with the Slughorn situation, and Jim Broadbent, a wonderful actor, was a great Slughorn.  I thought the Slughorn dinner parties were perfect, and the Slughorn shame at giving in to young Tom Riddle (in the films - AKA "Damien Son of Omen" Riddle) was ideal. 

But Snape was even more of a no-show in this film than in some of the other earlier films.  I read somewhere that J.K. Rowling had revealed to Alan Rickman, and only to Alan Rickman, Snape's secret Dickensian motivation for all of his double-dealings and complex actions.  Well, yeah, and for what reason?  Because the Half-Blood Prince is onscreen for like 3 minutes in the whole long movie!  At the end, he blurts that Harry can't use his own curses against him, because "I'm the Half-Blood Prince."  So, I hope people can see what I mean when I say that people who've only seen the movies will be well-led to think "Snape Bad."  It looks like Snape purposely wants to save Draco just in order to be able to kill Dumbledore, with no small measure of "Impress the Dark Lord with my sycophantic brilliance and shut that screeching banshee Bellatrix up already!"  At the end, inexplicably, Harry is wandering below Dumbledore's eyrie as the Deatheaters close in, and Snape suddenly pops up and hushes Harry, then leaps upstairs, pushing Draco aside and killing Dumbledore with the unforgiveable curse.

In the book, which I should admit right now is my favorite Harry Potter book due to the remarkably similar feel to David Copperfield, the initial scene where Snape vows to Narcissa Malfoy that he will save Draco from a certain horrible fate, was the scene which convinced me "Snape Good," a position from which I could not be moved until the release of the last book, in which my solid conviction was wholly-vindicated.  It helps to have read every last word Dickens ever wrote in these things; I do understand people who state that the Harry Potter books have Tom Brown's School Days all over them.  Well, yeah, somewhat.  But the story movement and character friendships and revelations and "questing journey" and character names more memorable than even Dickens - is Dick-Ens.  All Dickens, All the Time, Dick-Ens.

The one thing that I've consistently pointed up about J.K. Rowling is that in all the ways that the Harry Potter books "feel" Dickensian, she has a skill in an area far exceeding Dickens, and in this, she may be the top author of all time.  I've never seen anyone plot so well as she, and keep it up for an entire series.  As Harry himself would say, "Brilliant."

So, Snape Good - Snape Bad is one of the linchpins of this massive plot.  To indicate crude-movie style that Snape right now is a bad guy, and whoops! later on - Fooled ya! is cheating the moviegoers.  They managed to thoroughly Slughorn out the Slughorn episode, and portray nearly all of that sad situation as well as the crucial horcrux information.  They fully-portrayed Ron's Lavender Brown debacle, Hermione's misery due to Lavender, and Ron's love potion chocolate misadventure.  They also cheated poor, sad Draco a bit, making him look like a patsy and a fool; never really dangerous.  Yes of course he was a patsy and a fool for cruel Voldemort - who only appears in this film as Damien Son of Omen Tom Riddle.  They had the phoenix flying around at the very end, and frankly - a lot of moviegoers won't necessarily recognize a "phoenix" unless it's shown dead first, then rising from flames, and then somebody explains it to somebody else. 

The folks that are making the films are probably immersed in the books to the point that they may not recognize what parts of the story viewers "ought to" see, and what parts can be edited out.  Translation of a huge book to film is never easy.  Many large parts are often left out, and the key is to choose exactly the right ones to include and to discard.  For such a grand saga, it is a little confusing that Lavender got left-in, every little bit, and Snape was left out of his own namesake story. 

As someone who'd gladly watch Snape salt and prepare toads for first-year students, it made me kind of sad. And they also shortchanged the Weasley brothers, and inexplicably burned down the Weasley house while Tonks and Lupin made a brief appearance. 

Alice In Gnarlyland

Thanks to Meredith, I was treated to Perez's commentary on the upcoming Tim Burton film version of Alice in Wonderland. I had a chitchat with Meredith as to who would be whom in such a film.

Whom could Johnny Depp play?  Why, as you see to the left - the Mad Hatter.  Duh!  The ever creepy Helena Bonham Carter is an unspeakable Queen of Hearts (with "heart" lips - go see Perez to see her). 

Anne Hathaway looks extremely cool as an all-white dressed and coiffed character that I can only think is "the White Rabbit" or something like that.  A beautiful actress named Mia Wasikowska is Alice.

According to Perez, they are all "trannylicious."  Luv u, Perez.